Political Humor - Closing the Boston Globe
Political Humor – Closing the Boston Globe
Not usually known for its Political Humor and wit, the Boston Globe demanded several concessions from its workers this week in order to keep the paper afloat. The workers said ‘no.’ Where the workers think their next paycheck might be coming from is anyone’s guess.
David Scharfenberg of the Boston Globe floated the idea back in February to use $100 million in federal funding to support journalists. The Obama administration appears somewhat disposed to create a legality that would allow pouring millions of taxpayer dollars into these leftist manure mills. Since TARP funds were used for GM and Chrysler, why not for the Globe. And like bailing out the UAW, federal funds would ultimately be used to bail out the Boston Newspaper Guild the largest Globe workers union. These workers will be very important to the Obama re-election campaign in 2012.
Democrats don’t understand the real reasons behind why the Globe, NYT and others are failing. Constant worship at the altar of liberalism limits one’s audience to about half the population and eventually ruins whatever credibility the institution might have generated over the years. CBS News made this mistake in hiring of Katie Couric to pump up their sagging viewership. Unfortunately for them, CBS’ problem wasn’t performance quality; the problem was lack of credibility.
This underscores a larger problem with Democrats’ understanding of how enterprise and capital work to begin with, but suffice it to say that our new leftist leadership in Washington isn’t willing to accept failure of these print institutions because they provide such favorable spin to leftist causes. And they are free. Initiatives like taking over health care, bailing out General Motors and others and protecting the Obama administration from accountability or blame for inflation and stagnation are but a few reasons the failing papers might get bail out funding.
Never the less, northeastern Democrats serving in Washington are beginning to feel the heat from Obama’s failed Stimulus projects. Unemployment, although slowing, is well above the level predicted by Obama himself. One day soon, the Obama administration will have to take responsibility for the economy and that won’t be good for leftist re-election prospects. AIG and other scandals have threatened the likes of Senator Chris Dodd and Barney Frank’s unbelievably poor oversight of the mortgage industry has Democrats concerned about their future livelihoods. Keeping the Globe open would be a perfect retirement home for leftist leftovers from the upcoming Obama disaster.
In saving the Globe, federal lefties have a few expectations. Here is what the Globe’s editorial lineup might look like:
Comics and Humor – Senator John Kerry. Kerry once called on the federal government to bail out the Globe to preserve a “diversity of opinion” in the media. That was his best joke ever. It seemed to have escaped the MA Senator that achieving diversity of opinion requires including opinions opposed to the dominant liberal culture. Kerry’s ability to deliver a joke with his dead-pan (or just plain ‘dead’) style is legendary, once earning him the nickname “Lurch” after the Addams Family’s butler.
Business and Finance –US Rep. Barney Frank. Given the Congressman’s ability to speak for hours without saying anything the representative should be a good fit for a paper needing to fill column inches. Frank’s complete inability to understand how mortgages to unqualified buyers impacted the entire economy would make him the leading candidate for the financial position at the Globe. This would hopefully keep him off the radio.
Editorial Page Manager – Senator Bernie Sanders. Even the Democrats are too far right for Senator Sanders of Vermont. Where Vermont voters want the country to go is beyond understanding – influenced perhaps by overindulgence in ice cream. A self described Socialist Senator is just what the Globe needs to drive its opinion section.
Health and Fitness – former Governor of Vermont and DNC Chairman Howard Dean. As a Physician, Dean decided he could better serve the people by being Governor. One wonders whether his patients agreed.
Resident Conservative Commentator – Senator Susan Collins. One of the two Republican “Maine Ladies” would give balance to the editorial page by agreeing with liberal views.
Beauty and Lifestyle – Since Helen Thomas didn’t qualify, editorship of the Beauty and Lifestyle page should go to former US Rep. Patsy Schroeder. Schroeder took her Ivy League education out west to indoctrinate the urban masses there in the early 1970s. For those that remember, Ms. Schroeder had one of the worst hair presentations in the history of Congress rivaling even the horrible toupee worn by former Rep. James Traficant. A Democrat convicted of 10 felony counts including racketeering and bribery, Traficant’s toupee didn’t come close to matching the remaining hair on his head. Ms. Schroeder had a total of one hair perm-which made the national news- during her long tenure in the House. She will be requesting frequent guest columns from Nancy Pelosi.
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Tom the Redhunter says:
June 10th, 2009 at 9:04 pm
“Democrats don’t understand the real reasons behind why the Globe, NYT and others are failing.”
Yup. I’m sure you saw Newsweek’s Evan Thomas say that Obama was “standing above the country, above - above the world, he’s sort of God.”
i’d say this was mind-boggling but since the campaign we’ve seen too much of it. Sadly, Thomas is all too typical.